Truth or Descrimination? You Decide!

Before I begin I wish to state that the content of this article is purely my personal opinion that was fed on my experiences and encounters over the years. If any of you are offended by it, I apologize in advance. But I am a strong believer (and I try to do whatever necessary to stick to my belief) of the power of equality and the freedom of speech. Thus, I use this space (calligraphy for thought indeed) to forward my ideas about an issue that evokes a great deal of empathy and sorrowful confusion in me, an issue that several of my Islam friends and I have painstakingly discussed for hours, an issue that small groups of women in Arab are fighting about and an issue that is constantly being debated in nations that are advocates of freedom – discrimination against Islamic women. 

A male Islam friend of mine was recently talking about the ‘modernization’ of the Arabic burqa. Well, elimination of it altogether where many Islam girls nowadays choose the ‘unconventional’ kurtha top, jeans and a shawl instead of wearing the former. Another friend publicly told a young girl off because she was ‘too friendly’ with male colleagues, whilst the same friend danced with a non-Islam colleague wearing a tube dress at a company formal.  The logic of this I do not understand. I also do not have the mind scope to process how spelling out rules to a group of imperfect humans by another group of humans is the right thing to do. Didn’t God create all living beings equal? How is it that a man can wear shorts on a hike and a woman is expected to cover her arms on a scorching summer day? Why is it that women who reveal a modest amount of skin are labeled provocative (I’m am not talking about provocative standards in the West mind you, I am not talking of anything close to what Lady Gaga wears in her videos!) while men can go for a swim in a public pool? Aren’t the good and the bad, a state of mind? Shouldn’t we stone snobs and jealous women and liars and perverted men instead of those who choose to harmlessly deviate from standards?

The provoking point for this theme of my article is nothing I’ve against the Islam religion. In fact, I am marveled by the constant faith Islamic people hold. The number of people that walk out of a Mosque Friday afternoon each week is a sign of the commitment these men have for their faith. The Koran is a beautiful book that I haven’t got the privilege to read cover to cover yet. But like stated in the first bit, the experiences I sometimes have are ones that get me thinking and wondering why some are incapable of accepting their very faults. I’m sure that I would receive some defensive comments upon this piece as well. 

Islamic men expect to marry a beautiful, religious, young virgin. I believe (with my limited knowledge and a slightly larger common sense) that the same ought to be expected of men too. But the unfortunate experience I have had as a non-Islam associating with dozens of Islam men and women are that some men are fans of Pitbull, whilst they expect their female counterparts to abstain from shaping their eyebrows. ‘Natural beauty is a worthy woman’s asset’ they say, yet Pitbull’s curvy Latinos are entertaining? 

Religions are beautiful communities (even though, in the ideal world, everyone would be good with no religious commitments or all people would be equally united under one universal faith. Maybe this would happen in another couple of centuries when the human morale is advanced enough to not need rules to do the right thing, but right now external disciplining is essential for humans just like it is for a kitten who steals food from the table or a puppy who chews on slippers). They were born to improve the quality of life of humans and not oppress a part while exhilarating another. If one wishes to follow a teaching steadfastly, they should give the others the freedom to choose their own way rather than discriminating them for what they choose to do or choose not to do. I’m sure that all of you will wholeheartedly agree that all religions were created for love and care, for creating a safer society and a enriching atmosphere. 

I admire Islam girls who choose to wear the burqa or commit to religious responsibilities and marry the man their families choose for them and still be happy. In fact, I carry a great deal of respect towards them, for I can never obediently agree with the choices others make for me. I guess I am very unruly in that department. But my concern is for intelligent women who wish to peruse their PhD’s, but are forced to marry and produce children rather than going abroad and studying; my concern is for girls whose brothers do not let them talk with boys in public while they date non-Islam girls all their teens to ultimately marry a ‘pure’ Islam woman of a good breed; my concern is for girls who have made the mistake (If I recall right, it is human to make mistakes) of falling in love before they should and get battered by their families for it. Above all, my concern is for those who expect women to follow their religion perfectly, while men – the makers of the conditions and the implementers of the law – are openly doing things clearly against religion. If it is not OK for a girl to post pictures of her uncovered face on “Facebook” (I’m sure Zuckerberg and the gang named the site ‘Facebook’ for a reason), it should not be OK for boys to post school trip photos with swimming trunks on. If a girl who has an innocent love affair is not ‘clean’ enough to marry, men should not be allowed to date a dozen different women before they formally settle down. 

Well, pardon me for repeating the words ‘should’ and ‘it is not ok’ because all this is a simple matter of self worth. If one wishes the world to do the so called truthful thing, that one should do it first. Being offended or defensive against those of us (because we judge on what we experience) who point these illogicalities is not the answer because that would simply prove the lack of openness that all educated individuals should carry. But reflecting upon the image that a group presents to those who are outside and forming it in such a way that the undistorted image is communicated is essential. If you have gaudy silver chains around your neck and tattoos covering every inch of skin and do not want people to mistakenly judge you for a delinquent, you should show them that you are a timid, kind hearted person in spite of your fashion sense; if you wish to disprove the fact that blondes are dumb, then be smart. The theory is pretty simple. Practice what you preach because what you practice is what the world will judge you on. 

I wish to repeat the fact that my opinion was aroused by a couple of dozen experiences I’ve had. If you are a man of religion who practices every deed to the best of your ability, I respect you. But if you don’t, you are just human – join the club! But if you are one that sits around not doing the right thing or not even trying but expecting others to, it is your strange behavior that scar the reputation of a whole bunch of people that belong to your group. This is true in the case of all stereotypes, all condemnations. No stereotype was born out of the blue. Never the less, whichever group you belong to religious or not, racial or not, sexual orientation or food choice, robbing away another’s freedom ought to be unethical, shouldn't it?