I came home today to find a very
interesting pamphlet among my mail. The cover, printed in gorgeous Algerian fonts
read “Concerning the true nature of marriage and the cult of homosexuality”. At
first glance, I (an equal-rights advocate attempting to respect the rights and
choices of all human beings unless mass murder is involved, of course) was
bewildered and tossed the gold and white pamphlet into the garbage. It wasn’t until
I threw out last night’s pasta and curry (who eats pasta and curry? Well, that
will be my next debate) also into the garbage that my curiosity to know what
was actually inside that leaflet arose. So yes, I did dig into the stinky bin
full of food-waste and here’s what I found.
The pamphlet contained ten justifications
with quotes taken from the Holy Bible as to why homosexuality is a ‘juvenile
disorder resulting from the dislocation of normal and natural family
relationships’, an ‘essentially immature and generally narcissistic self-indulgence’
and a ‘blasphemy against god and a rebellion against nature’. Before I begin,
let me clearly disclose that the content of this is solely based on my opinions
and my personal experiences. I am not a religious researcher. I am yet in doubt
of my sexual orientation. So, I am not an advocate of myself, just a nauseated
self-proclaimed writer facing a quarter-life crisis, attempting to make
everything else her problem as means of running away from her own!
I was raised in a conventional Catholic
background. I was a convent-girl. Yes, I did go to school with all girls
wearing very long, neck throttling, highly self-confidence shattering uniforms. I
learned my prayers before I learned my national anthem. All the songs I knew as
a kid had something to do with God or Christmas or both. All my crushes were
boys from church. My mum considers herself a believer. But as I give her all of
the credit to what I have become today (if that’s anything to be proud of!) I also
have to applaud her for being a very understanding parent and not shoving down
beliefs or broccoli down my throat. Just as she let me choose pathetic men and
kept saying “darling, heartbreak is only going to make you stronger”, she also
let me discover my own religious and moral grounds.
I haven’t still discovered that ground. I
have denounced the concept of creation, but I still go to church. I respect my
God for all the values he/she taught me that helped me become the woman I am
now but I don’t own a bible. I admit I am indecisive, yet I learn so much from
my shifting states for I am still in doubt. I believe that a doubter is the
smartest one of all. Or should I say I doubt that the doubter is the smartest
one of all! Most importantly, whether I pray to someone who could possibly
exist or not, I attempt to be a good human being. I try not to worry whether
the heavens will open its gates to me, but I do try to enter as many human hearts
as possible. And a part of becoming that empathetic, non-judgmental, accepting human being (current success rate, 0.000007% to be very modest), I try to accept everyone for who they are.
So that is why, like most of you out there,
I don’t tolerate arrogant, ignorant concepts shoved at me by people who believe
that they are better than the rest or that someone, somewhere has placed them on
a pedestal with the giant Final-Judgement Book. I believe in the human right to
equality, that everyone should be entitled to make his or her own choices
provided no one else is harmed. As I read the quotes from the Bible stated in
the pamphlet – “hence the sin of sodomity condemned by St. Paul (Romans
1:24-28; Corinthians 6:9: Timothy 1:10)” – I couldn’t help but remember the verse
my mother always used to say to me, also taken from the very Holy Bible - “Why
do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention
to the plank in your own eye?” (Matthew 7:3)
There’s more where that came from. "Do
not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be
condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven” (Luke 6:37). “Therefore let us
stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any
stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister” (Romans 14:13)
It is inherent human nature to think that
the group they belong to is better than the rest, but putting down those who
are outside your group for being something that don’t fit with you, fit in
with the lines that you have drawn for yourself, is just beyond egocentrism –
the one value that all religions condemn. To me, it is not a preferment of God’s
family, but a display of one’s own inadequacies. To me, the only thing “self-indulgent”
or “narcissistic” or “needs healing” is the loathing people carry against others.
I believe and I have seen how love, in its pure sense, can exist between a man
and another man as it can between a man and a woman. I have seen beautiful, happy
children being raised by two cooperative mothers as opposed to a pair of
conflicting heterosexual parents. I’ve seen homosexuals as moral, kind and full
of love as heterosexuals. How then, is homosexuality a “corruption of morals”
or a “disintegration of family life”?
Finally, since this was all triggered by a
bunch of justifications with the holy text in the forefront, let me finish also
with a quote from the Bible. “You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass
judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are
condemning yourself” (Romans 2:1).
